I’ve worked for myself for almost a decade now, and I still remember the guilt I would feel if my calendar wasn’t fully booked. Every single day when I first started, I felt like I had to sit in front of my computer, connecting with clients, providing a service, or invoicing. I couldn’t enjoy stepping away, because each time came with a sense that I’m not doing enough for my business.

While I could take walks or even go to an afternoon movie, my partner was in an office, sitting in meetings for the entire day. When she came home exhausted, and I still had plenty of energy left, this guilt would rise again—after all, did I not do enough during the day?

 

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In truth, what I experienced as a solopreneur isn’t unique to those that work for themselves or run private practices, or even entrepreneurs that may build larger firms. When ripping ourselves away from work, guilt can rise, out of the fear we’re not doing enough for the business. If revenues drop, we can feel a deep sense of failure, like we’re letting our family or ourselves down. Countering this mindset is important to long-term self-employment success.

It's common across cultures too. For example, researchers found this sense of guilt to the business and family was high among Italian female entrepreneurs, in a study published last year. Not only that, but this sense of guilt eats into your ability to take time off. The guilt actually reduces the amount of enjoyment you gain from the few leisure activities that you allow yourself, according to research published in 2021 by the Journal of Experimental Psychology.

Yet creating ways to remove yourself from the practice or solo business is key to your overall health and well-being. Instead, it’s important to come up with solutions for your guilt, addressing it head-on, so you can go to that afternoon matinee without an overwhelming sense of dread filling your head.

Plan With Breaks in Mind

It’s highly possible that you’re underpricing your service, whether you’re in private practice or managing a different type of business. Why? Because you’re not accounting for time off when you’re calculating your hourly rates.

In theory, it’s a very simple process to come up with a rate that works for your income. Say you want to make $100,000. If you work 48 weeks out of the year, 40-hour weeks, then all you have to do is charge $52/hour in order to reach $100,000.

But if you were to charge only $52 per hour, then you would never reach your goal since you’re not likely to fully book every hour of every day. What if, instead, you were to calculate your hour based on having a fully booked calendar for three days a week, for 48 weeks? Then, your rate climbs to $87. This leaves 16 hours a week for admin duties and other time.

If you do not need all that admin time, it also opens the ability to free up time when you can do other activities outside of work. Now, if you increase your rate to $100, then you free up even more time, forcing you to only book about half of the week for 48 weeks.

Doing this math can reduce some of your anxiety when stepping out for a Tuesday afternoon yoga session since it’s built into your business strategy.

Remember the Benefits of Breaks

You’re your own boss, but it doesn’t mean you’re a kind boss. In fact, there’s a good chance you’re harder on yourself than anybody else. This adds to that sense of guilt while stepping away.

To overcome this feeling, remind yourself of the value that breaks can provide to your success or well-being. Walk breaks, for example, have been shown to improve mood, energy, fatigue, and stress during the workday. They’ve also been shown to improve decision-making, particularly when you’re feeling overwhelmed with the many decisions you must make. And they can increase productivity, as well as your imagination, helping you to overcome tough obstacles.

Remembering the value of the breaks can make it easier to step away. It becomes a part of the business’s process. Your break is simply bringing value to your business (and yourself).

So much of self-employment is a balance between the mind and the numbers. Developing a strategy to address both can remove the guilt, giving you a chance to relax.