Over the last four months since the launch of my book, Flawed: Why Perfectionism is a Challenge for Management, I've been on a mission to spread the message about the profound negative impact of perfectionism on our productivity, well-being, and overall functioning. 

 

By far the biggest obstacle that I've faced on this mission is the robust belief by many people that perfectionism is good—that it's helpful and worth it. It's not. Whenever I hear this, I want to scream from the rooftops: "Perfectionism is not your friend!"

Perfectionism, by definition, is characterized by rigid thinking and excessive and unreasonable goals (1). Those two ingredients alone are inherently unhealthy. In fact, many evidence-based psychotherapy techniques and approaches are based on mechanisms of trying to enhance mental flexibility, which is the opposite of rigid thinking. Examples include cognitive defusion as part of acceptance and commitment therapy (2); cognitive restructuring as part of cognitive therapy (3); and inhibitory learning as part of exposure-based behavior therapy (4). The bottom line here is that rigid thinking is not your friend.

Excessive and unreasonable goals also are unhealthy. Striving for outcomes that are unattainable is a great way to consistently feel awful about yourself, the world around you, and your future. In addition, sometimes perfectionists pursue principles that are masquerading as goals (5). This is particularly problematic because principles are abstract and unattainable—you can only demonstrate fidelity toward them. For example, you cannot achieve the global principle of "do no harm," but you can show fidelity towards it across different circumstances.

When perfectionists treat principles as if they were attainable, concrete goals, they can never make a mistake and always seem behind the eight ball on this "goal." Also, because principles do not have an end date, the demoralizing pursuit of a principle masquerading as a goal never really ends. The bottom line here is that an excessive and unreasonable goal is not your friend.

Both ingredients of perfectionism are unhealthy, but what makes this type of mindset so devastating is the combination of both ingredients. Pursuing excessive and unreasonable goals (i.e., one ingredient) is destructive enough, but imagine doing so with a level of rigid thinking (i.e., second ingredient) that prevents you from seeing this pattern and stopping yourself from making any changes. This is perfectionism in a nutshell.

Unfortunately, the misconception that perfectionism is a good thing has many people unwilling to loosen their grip on this worldview. There is a related belief that giving up perfectionistic thinking and behavior will reduce the quality of your work and cause others to believe you aren't good enough.

Nonsense.

It's nonsense because you can embrace excellence and high standards without being perfectionistic. Pursuing excellence differs from perfectionism in that it's flexible and based on reasonable, achievable goals. You can create pristine products without being perfectionistic. Actually, the ultimate irony is that by giving up perfectionistic approaches, you free yourself to create a more perfect product.

The bottom line is that perfectionism is not your friend. So, give it up. And please help me spread the message.