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Burnout. Emotional exhaustion. Stress. Overwhelm.

We hear the complaints often. While we're all familiar with the symptoms, the causes often differ from person to person. In fact, what might cause one individual to feel overwhelmed may cause another to feel elated and fulfilled. What might trigger emotional exhaustion in one individual, may cause another to feel energized and excited. And, what might cause one individual to feel burnout may cause another to feel sated and happy.

Knowing yourself is key. When individuals understand their core triggers, they can maximize activities to increase their emotional bank account. When individuals have more emotional reserves, they can better acknowledge and manage potentially stressful situations in a healthy way.

Three Steps:

• Clarify your core drivers.
• Raise your emotional bank account (doing activities aligned with those core drivers).
• Understand that not all individuals share the same emotional priorities.

Here's how to avoid burnout, emotional exhaustion, and overwhelm:

1. Tune in to what drives you; what truly lights you up. Note: You know you're on the right track when it's something "weird" that wouldn't necessarily sound fun or relaxing to anyone else.

2. Communicate to those who love you that this is what makes you feel really happy. Note: Use the word "happy." For instance, "You know what would make me feel really happy? If I went to a hip-hop dance class twice a week!"

3. Decide that you deserve to feel happy. Then, use a tactic that is most likely to work for you.

 

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Here are some tactics, according to anxiety styles:

If you're a lover... Make plans to spend quality time with someone you love. Remember that filling your own emotional bank account is a powerful way to show self-love, build self-confidence, and leave you feeling more patient with those you love most in the world. You are worthy of the time and attention of others. Connecting with those you love lights you up deeply. Doing more of what lights you up can reduce the likelihood of burnout and overwhelm.

If you're a dynamo... List all of the benefits you can think of in doing something that lights you up, then literally add it to your to-do list at least twice a week. Make it non-negotiable. You're more likely to fill your emotional bank account when you logically see all the practical benefits and set a distinct goal around it. Achieving important tasks and projects lights you up deeply. Doing more of what lights you up can reduce feelings of resentment and irritability.

If you're an executive... Plan ahead. Get whatever gear or supplies you might need, sign up, register, or commit to a friend. You are more likely to follow through with your emotional self-care if you plan ahead for it and have an accountability partner who is depending on you. Feeling in control of your future and getting organized with your life helps you feel safe. Spending some time balancing that control with playful activities with no "right" or "wrong" answers can help you relax a bit and know that you are indeed safe and sound.

If you're a visionary... Start soon and start small. Visionaries often wait until everything is perfect or everything is aligned. You're more likely to follow through with your emotional self-care if you just do it now. Commit to it. Don't analyze it or plan ahead. Don't wait until you've figured out the "perfect thing." Instead, try anything with a 70% chance of lighting you up today. Moving toward your dreams in an actionable way can reduce feelings of frustration and emotional constipation.

If you're a fighter... You might already be the best at this. If so, kudos to you. If not, it's OK. Remember you deserve to feel good, to be respected, to have health and wealth and love in your life. Remember to choose an activity that not only feels good at the moment but will also have a lasting emotional impact. (Instead of something that feels good only at the moment, which might leave you in a worse-off situation tomorrow.) Facing challenges can be exciting and invigorating to you, which can heighten the risk of emotional burnout. Taking a moment to determine whether you have the desire and the bandwidth to handle additional challenges can reduce the risk of overwhelm and emotional exhaustion.

Then, use these tips to tune in, communicate your needs, and decide to do what lights you up more often. Regardless of your anxiety style, you are worthy of a joyful life. And while a joyful life will not come without challenges, refilling your emotional bank account is key to better managing and more quickly recovering from the inevitable setbacks of life.