You have probably heard of FOMO (the fear of missing out), particularly in the age of social media where the events we miss are readily visible. However, what about the flip side? Is there also joy to be had in missing out (JOMO)? Recently, my students and I published a study where we attempted to measure JOMO. We defined JOMO as “enjoyment from periods of disconnection from others or social demands.” This work was inspired by research showing the importance of FOMO on a sense of well-being and with the assumption that social media are a breading ground for feelings of FOMO. Our JOMO study was also initially conceived in the Spring of 2020 during the initial COVID-19 lockdowns, when we were all missing out on things!

We thought that JOMO might reflect well-being where a person can achieve some sort of heightened mindfulness and avoid distress that might come with feeling pressure to stay constantly connected. That is, just as there might be a fear of missing out on activities or being excluded, there might also be joy in disconnecting for a time. In our first sample of 507 adults (ages 19 to 59), JOMO was correlated with life satisfaction and mindfulness, which was consistent with what we expected. However, to our surprise, JOMO was also related to social media use, loneliness, FOMO, and social anxiety. That signaled that JOMO might involve a sense of relief from some people who are stressed by social interactions.

In a follow-up with a new sample of participants (488 adults ages 18 to 59), we wanted to see if there are different “profiles” of people based on their JOMO, social media engagement, and loneliness. That way, we could see whether JOMO is just another way of getting at introversion or even social anxiety or whether there really were people who experienced JOMO in the way that we initially thought of it.

We found four groups of individuals in this sample. The largest groups were individuals who rated themselves low in JOMO. That is, most people appear to like being connected to others. Indeed, most people probably need consistent social connections. The two JOMO profiles with higher JOMO consisted of far fewer people, with one group also demonstrating high loneliness and social anxiety, perhaps pointing to an avoidance of stressful interactions (yet still feeling lonely and isolated). The remaining group showed lower distress but also scored low on indicators of well-being.

These initial results led us to conclude that if someone experiences JOMO on a consistent basis (almost like an attribute of personality,) they may be avoiding social situations because of stress or anxiety. However, it may be best to consider true JOMO as a state rather than a personality trait, where many people feel rejuvenated by periods of solitude but still desire, and benefit from, periods of connection to others. We are in the process of designing a study to look at this possibility. Like many things, maybe missing out is best "enjoyed" in moderation.